So, I’ve been blocked by TWO men on a dating site. Not because of what you are assuming (that I obsessively messaged them begging them to have my children). One of them asked me to ‘friend’ them on Facebook. I told him “I would prefer to not add someone from a dating site to Facebook, as I made that mistake already and shit got weird.” He blocked me, but not before emailing me to tell me at least he knows now instead of later how “absolutely dishonest” I am.
The other? Oh this is a good one.
Ok, so I have this date set up with this SUPER hottie. Like, Abercrombie and Fitch model, hot. We’ll say his user name is LoveLob. We started with a bit of witty banter over email. He opened with “Haven’t I seen you somewhere before?” I responded with “Probably because I’m really famous in Germany. I tour with The Hof.” We’ve talked on the phone. We’ve texting back and forth.
But something seems off though. For instance, he asks if I am going back to fishing. I respond, “I injured my arm last year, so as soon as I sort that out, I can’t wait to get back to it.” His response?
“Wait. Are you missing an arm?”
Um, no, I have all my limbs and even all my fingers and toes.
Yeah alright, maybe he has an active imagination…at least that makes things interesting.
Anyway, he says a few more odd things and I decide to cancel, politely.
And then…he FLIPS. Starts emailing me, all crazy like. How I’ve made everything a nightmare, how dare I judge him, blah blah blah. I basically ignore him. I mean, come the fuck on. We have never even met!!
About 15 minutes later, I get a message from a user named Thunderpants that I had never seen on the god forsaken site before. First of all, ‘Thunderpants’?? AWESOME. Pants opens with a witty line and an attached pic of a SMOKIN bod. I mean, come on. You had me at Thunderpants. I click on the profile…